ghost town.

can't help but be a bit spooked. this place is a ghost town. everyone has gone home. my roommates somehow finagled me into being the last one here.

can't contain my eagerness combined with nerves. i have my honors philosophy 201 final tomorrow. we have to do an extensive and comprehensive essay on what we've learned this semester (and that's just part of the test). oy veh.

can't stop listening to this. paul simon meets the shins equates to pure bliss.

can't preclude my thoughts of going home. it's so strange. i did not want to come here. i wanted to stay home. it was too hard to be alone, and on my own. too difficult to leave behind childhood + dependency + home + late blooming. but now that i'm here {you all told me it would happen this way. you were right.}, i don't know how i feel about leaving. and i know i'm only leaving for 2 weeks, only to come back and run the whole exhausting + competitive routine all over again. and it's not that i don't want to be home. i do more than anything. i love home....truth be told, the real thing that initiated these thoughts is the huge amount of luggage i'm taking home. i loaded up my brother's car on wednesday. and am about to load up another. will i need my pots? my pans? surely i will need more than half my wardrobe. i don't know why i feel so weird and nostalgic about leaving this place that isn't my home. i think that is why i'm struggling. i do feel like it's home.

can't decide if i'm sorry peter. i am totally pulling a wendy on you. i waited for you. but you never came back.

can't wait for the wedding. can wait to let go of the sister forever. i love you girl.