dating at byu.

over the weekend, I went to a BYU stake dance (insert a small defense of why I went to a stake dance). as I was about to leave (had my green puffy coat on), a young male asked me to dance. I agreed. after half a song, he got my phone number and proceeded to ask me for a date for Wednesday at 8 p.m. at 5:35 Wednesday evening, I received the following text message:

"Aim-ster, there comes a time in life that some receive the Gift of Dating Prophecy. I prophesy that our date will be like trying to mix koolaid and olive oil. You're olive oil, and I'm koolaid. This is a metaphor. Let's just turn back time to before we set the date. We know you were after my wallet anyway. Let's just be friends on facebook or something. Merry christmas!"

whoever decided arranged marriages were a bad idea never had to date in Provo.

nina's 90th birthday at inchmark.

I'm in such a party-throwing mood and also love my grandmother--which is why I really enjoyed reading about Nina's 90th birthday on Inchmark.

also because of this party-throwing mood, I am super excited for my 3rd annual Valentine's party.

and I'm thinking about throwing a half-birthday party on Feb. 20. what do you think?

Manju Kumar.

look how smart my 8th graders are! (well I didn't teach them robotics, but I did read To Kill A Mockingbird with them!) this is Manju Kumar, Shanti Bhavan Children's Program

$1 bowl from d.i.

this milk glass candy dish I found yesterday at the D.I. for one American dollar has made me so happy. I really love it.

i love my roommates.

this weekend I took some pictures for the first time in a long time. my little Canon PowerShot A560 is kind of getting old. but what's a girl to do with but a few pennies in her bank account? I think the old point-and-shoot will do until I can pay my bills.

I'm reading this book and love it so far. doesn't Ariel look stunning in those colors?

hope.

great image from Haiti . Evening Star.

"Embrace this day with an enthusiastic welcome, no matter how it looks. The covenant with God to which you are true enables you to become enlightened by him, and nothing is impossible for you"
- Elder Enzio f. Busche, BYU, May 1996 (video via Spencer)

I want to go. Should I forfeit Washington this summer and go?

i really wish i had one of these.

I saw these SpinThread necklaces on Neon Polish. and want one. any ideas out there on how to make one?

sartorialist

wish I was her. sartorialist.

deer bookends.

I like these bookends.

happy friday.

looking through my pictures and saw these 6th graders at SB. I miss those lighting, those walls.

current interests.

I'm enjoying myself during the first week back to school. and taking advantage of the time I have to do a little posting. these past few weeks I have gained a few interests:

1. I discovered the OraBrush while watching this little video. and come to find out, their headquarters are in Springville, Utah. now, I haven't used mine yet because I just got it in the mail--but I'm really looking forward to it. they are offering them for free--pay for shipping and handling. if you are in the Utah Valley area, I would opt to pick it up from their offices. I paid $7.99 for my s+h and when I looked on my package it only cost them $1.98.

2. Dave Farmar yoga podcasts. I learned about Dave Farmar while listening to free 20-minute yoga downloads from iTunes. thanks to Melissa and Dani I've been running and doing a little yoga afterward.

3. Dave Salmoni and Into the Pride. I have been coming home at 5 to watch this show on Animal Planet. I love it so much. this decent-looking man is just living with a pride of lions in Africa and it looks like so much fun. the landscape is beautiful and I just love those lions. plus, Animal Planet doesn't skimp on drama. I also watched Wild Recon tonight, but it wasn't nearly as good as Into the Pride. besides, I like lions a lot more since I met Christian.

book covers.

my friend Megan got me this beautiful copy of "Sense + Sensibility" from Anthropologie for Christmas. and now I want all of them.

2010. really?

where they create

still to do

2. bake something from scratch (perhaps a pie?)

3. handwrite Christmas letters to people I love but haven't really talked to in a long long while.

4. mail a package to Shanti Bhavan

5. write 1 personal history/story

6. write a feature on Shanti Bhavan

I am so excited for 2010. true, I have grown especially fond of 2009 recently. but 2010 is also a great time to be alive, and I'm thrilled about being in Provo, gearing up for D.C., making new friendships.

Melissa and I started walk/jogging in the afternoons. yesterday we found a path just beyond civilization and I felt like I could run on it forever. I really don't like running at all. at all. but on the dirt in the desert, looking out over the southern Utah horizon, I felt such resolution. like I could do this every day for the rest of my life.

this past semester was difficult for me--if I can even say that. my life is so blessed and so rich--I hate that I take it for granted so easily. but after Thanksgiving and the snow came to Provo, my paradigm shifted with no effort of my own. I normally don't like the snow. but this year I love it. I've never found a better companion in such hard times. it felt like rejuvenation and gave me the same resolution I felt yesterday on that dirt path.

I'm starting the new decade with high spirits. though I know myself too well to believe it will last, I feel resolved and resolute to believe next year will be better than the last. and the future has more in store for me than the past.

photo at Shanti Bhavan by Amiran White

my heart hurts. I want to go back to Shanti Bhavan every day. I don't know why it has just hit me this week. during finals.

I am "planning" on going to Washington D.C. in the summer. but right now I just can't fathom not going back to India. it's making me ill.

my heart hurts because I was born here. and when I'm here I wish I was there. and I know when I'm there, I will desperately miss everyone sitting with me now as I type.

10 things before 2010.

dresser. love one another print by persimmon and pink.

hello december.

I've been thinking a lot about new year's resolutions. doug informed me about this campaign to leave '09 behind. it was an actual campaign to get 2010 to start on November 30. I thought the idea was clever and thought even harder when each time I passed the news about this campaign on, I got a different response--some people agreed, some people felt sad, others felt outraged at the sheer hopelessness of hating an entire year. it presented a funny juxtaposition of optimism and pessimism. more recently, I encountered a trending topic on twitter--"#LeaveItInThe00s" and it dawned on me that we are approaching a new decade. what conclusions I drew from all this I don't know. but I did remember that Elder Holland once said that "every day should be the start of a new year." inspired by Jordan's 30 things before 30, I have made my list of 10 things before 2010.

1. start 200 sit-ups program

2. bake something from scratch (perhaps a pie?)

3. handwrite Christmas letters to people I love but haven't really talked to in a long long while.

4. mail a package to Shanti Bhavan

5. write 1 personal history/story

6. write a feature on Shanti Bhavan

7. do yoga at least once

8. buy a handmade Christmas for my friends + family

9. throw some sort of celebration for some of my best friends, gordy + brooke (roommate) who are getting married in far away Colorado in a few short weeks.

10. self-proclaimed water challenge: drink only water for 1 week, maybe longer.

think of anything else I should put on the list, let me know. 2009 is a great time to be alive.

dear elijah.

dear little babe,

I want you to know how much I love my one and only brother, your pops. I will always remember the time he carried me piggy-back all the way to the top of some peak at Yellowstone National Park. and I can't forget when he dressed up as prince charming (with a head of bleached-blonde hair) and danced with all my friends and me at my 6th birthday party. I still remember the day he left on his mission and the day he came home.

mostly, I'll remember the semester we spent together at BYU--my first, his last. my first day of college, I went into the Cougareat, and there he was. and every week he would come pick me up to watch House at his apartment. it was on those nights that he taught me to appreciate the true value of Hamburger Helper. on fridays, Melissa would come to Provo and the 3 of us ate at the Malt Shoppe. Melissa and I would try to give him girl advice. but we were never really that good at it. that's why we were grateful when he met and fell in love with your mommers, Jennifer. your dad picked me up when I got in that terrible car accident. afterward, he dropped me off to an apartment full of slightly insensitive roommates and freshman boys. he told them kindly to be a little nicer than usual to me. at the end of that semester, when he was graduating, I helped him move out of that 900 E apartment. it was over Christmas break and the heater had been turned off and broke. while I slept in my warm apartment across town, he couldn't sleep and moved most of his belongings into the car. on our way out of town that early morning, he drove me around to take some pictures for our sister Kate. on the way home, we dedicated ourselves to memorizing every word of Nickel Creek's The Fox.

and now, although logic defies it, it is so easy for me to believe this reality. that he is a dad. it's natural and familiar the way he makes sure I wash my hands before I touch you. or when he gets nervous when I change positions with you in my arms. he is your dad and my brother.

you are my first nephew. being the youngest, you are the first baby I've ever really known. and I love you to bits.

elijah bowlder mcdonald

born november 20, 2009

7 lbs 11oz

Ariel has a super nice camera and I borrowed it a few boring fridays ago.

I feel like my life is a Firefox window with 46 tabs open. and I wish it was Safari because it's cleaner and faster. and I keep forgetting things. like, my cell phone. or a pen. I don't even use my planner anymore. I do have a giant task list with boxes. I like the boxes--they are the hope that I might get something done. mostly, my strategy is just to react to things in their immediacy. this is a terrible strategy. there is so much to do, and so much information that interests me, and most of it is digital. I just need to be able to focus. my mom always tells me, "you can do a lot of things, but you can't do everything at once." good, better, best.

applying for internships in Salt Lake for next semester and D.C. for the summer. I'm really excited about both prospects but still feel my loyalties divided. where do I belong?

listening to an episode of This American Life about books that change people, a girl reads a letter from her grandfather who is very sick. he says, "I don't at all approve of my own extinction. I don't like the idea of it one bit. Though reason assures me that the world can get along very nicely without me, I can't quite believe that it will."

my mental capacity is only currently available for appreciating good writing, no longer analyzing or commenting and especially no creating. here are some things I have been creating:

a review of an Orem restaurant, Terra Mia.
a podcast interview with the owner of Provo hot dog stand, J Dawgs.
I really like Twitter. I use it a lot and it really does hurt every time someone rolls their eyes at me for using it.

golf for matt.

little Matt is having a golf tournament at South Gate Golf Course in St. George. Matt and his family are really close friends of mine and my parents. I love them and am touched by their faith and diligence in caring for their son Matt. please register! click here to register and learn more.

about Matt:

Matt is very much a miracle baby! We are lucky to have him with us. Matt was diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy following a traumatic birth. Matt suffered a brain injury due to lack of oxygen as a result of a uterine rupture that affected his fine, gross and oral motor skills.Shortly after Matt's birth the neonatologist was preparing to tell us that Matt would notsurvive; however, what they did not know at the time is that Matthew is a fighter! In fact, he has been fighting ever since to enjoy life and reach his full potential.

mary sheela.

i received an e-mail today from a SB volunteer coordinator in New York. another volunteer sent him this to pass on to me, from Mary Sheela. my darling little 4th grader. first one I ever taught bium pum pum to. I miss her so much. I miss feeling the way I felt there every day.


Dear Amy,
I miss playing, singing, and dancing burump um pum. I still have your photo. I also have the eraser and the sticker. I am so sad without you. You are in my heart. I am waiting for you to come back to Shanti Bhavan. Did you forget me? I have sad news. I was depromoted because I never studied well.
Love,
Mary

patience.

photo by Lotte Scott

"I know what it's like to freeze to death"
- james taylor