fence ad

saw this ad on campus and had to laugh. love the design and can't tell if it's advertising the fencing club or the honor code? either way works for me.


wish these pictures could breathe on you how cold today was. burr.


in need of...

this {urban outfitters}

and these {urban}

to go over these. {urban}

and top it off with this. {old navy}

also contepmlating these {zappos}

and uh. do i dare? {urban}


the first stop anyone who is visiting byu should make is the jsb. it looks like this tiny little building from the outside, but you enter and it houses like a million classes full of students. yesterday i entered for the first time this courtyard that lies in the center of the joseph smith building. it was a very peaceful 10 minutes. i closed my eyes and felt so incredibly warm yet so comfortable.

testing center

my first test went rather well. this particular test accounts for 25% of my grade and i felt...prepared. it is a very difficult course but in a good way. the testing center was probably the best thing that ever happened to me. it is one of the oldest buildings on campus that has antique wooden doors that reach to the cieling. a wonderful staircase that leads to the doorway where you enter and find yourself at an old wooden desk, where you recieve your test. i was nervous about the whole scenario until i opened the door into the actual room. it was so beautiful. hundreds upon hundreds of small desks filled with students in a tall-ceilinged room were encompassed with the light from great giant windows. as kate added, you just feel like you're at hogwarts, trying to pass your O.W.L.S. it was such a good experience. my test took me about twice as long because i simply doddled the whole time. i wish all of you could see it.

{this is the outside, and students are all seated on the lawn cramming before they enter}

creature of habit

look familiar mom? i have yet to overcome my messiness.



also on my way to school on tuesday. i loved that walk. i have decided i will resist getting a bus pass until the first snowfall. we'll see.

it totally snowed today! what the heck. it SO doesn't count.

to continue or to quit

i have recently stumbled upon this question on several occasions:
'should i continue or should i quit?'
it has been ingrained in {i think} most of my generation that quitting leaves you 'unqualified or unprepared at a time of opportunity' {winston churchill}. this is most certainly true. while i'm not sure that the opportunity comes for everyone--i do think that persaverence is a virtue and should be taught to all.
but i must protest the notion that it is a universal mistake to quit something good. whether in talents, relationships, or work. it is a choice of paths and you must choose the one that is right. it has been my fear that should i choose one path, that every day i continue down it, i shall wish i was running back to the fork only to start on the alternate path.

i encountered this paradigm when i made the choice to discontinue to pursue violin ambitiously. it was one of the happiest times in my life when i decided i wanted to go all the way. i was practicing millions of hours a day and enjoying every bit of it. i still miss that feeling. i was so happy to work hard and i knew it would get me somewhere. but i started to wonder if there was a difference between getting to that somewhere and being at that somewhere. i still can't quite decifer whether it was wanted because i loved working for it, or because i wanted to arrive at a goal. i came to the conclusion that for the timing of my life, i couldn't do what someone else wanted me to do for so long that i never got the chance to do what i wanted to do. reflecting back now, i see that i was choosing to continue because i was afraid of not being that violinist. not being so devoted it shocked people. not being what i possibly wanted to be. but as parminedes has recently taught me: not-being does not exist, only being. to choose to continue out of a fear of quitting is a mistake. no one can ever say 'what might have been.' who knows what is {right} between two {good choices.}

i do know that it is part of growing up. giving up. but i wish to insist that to quit is not always a mistake. it is a choice. and can very well be a good one.


Originally uploaded by Pandaman27

first college test in t minus 4 hours. am studying.



on my way to school.


college: glimpses

a look into me

woke up my rommate and asked her where she was last night. she was with a friend and wardmember whose best friend from home died in a car accident yesterday. i mourn.

walked to school in a thousand-degrees-below-zero rain. it seems all of campus is dismayed by the state of the atmosphere. i ponder.

intense newly-weds cuddle and caress beside me as i type. i am giggling.

a beautiful redhead in the library vigoursly comfirms...it's suzanne. i think it's suzanne. yeah it's suzanne. it's suzanne. it's suzanne. it's suzanne.... i smile.

suddenly remembered i dropped my academic planner and forgot to pick it up. wait til class is over. go back to where i dropped it and ask everyone around. venture to the lost + found in the deep basement of the wilk. sit down in the library. my planner is in my backpack. i text my brother the whole story.

saw my sister's ex-boyfriend in the bookstore and on a strange impulse said hello. i marvel.

free button-pins all over campus to save orca whales. hoards of people scramble for the one they want. i laugh with a stranger who chooses one for me.

i cannot set aside my ache to write things down. my desire to photograph things of beauty. my instinct to document anything and everything in between.


for your nourishment

photo from {flickr}
a quick and good scripture chain

"there is something in your eyes"

matthew 5: 14-16
matthew 6: 21-22
d + c 6: 21-22
d + c 88:50

audrey on the wall

much to my financial dismay, the poster sale was going on again this week. and with better deals. so i had to indulge. found one of the last audrey ones. there is hardly any wall space left {except for a huge surface where we plan to put a humongous map} so i put her in the hall. this way we can adore her without having to worship her.

harry potter specs

i would totally get these just to further prove my devotion to the boy who lived. but i am also starting to think they are really cute. found at fredflare.com

broccoli salad

decided to make my favorite broccoli salad of my mom's. i was worried i wouldn't be able to make it...{everything i've attempted to make so far has not been very tasty} but i did it! yay. it is so delicious, if you care to venture to make it:

chopped broccoli
red onion



my favorite caputre from the day.

we had pretty good seats. i can't imagine what it would be like to play a game in front of so many people.

before the rains came.


the homecoming game was loads of fun. started out nice, ended up wet. but we won! saw the old hometown hero james lark giving high fives after the game. was also in the crowd of attacking fans asking for any fragment of substance that had touched the body of the players. it was sweet...in a romantic sort of way. the whole concept of heroes is heart warming. but i couldn't help but question if that's they way it should be. the games always make me feel a sort of...insignificance. the marching band, the cheerleaders, the great stadium full of 65,000 people. i love it. but i can't help but crawl inside myself and wonder who i am.

also got to see erica, eric and addie. love them. addie is nearly 100 feet tall and turning 12. also - happy 17th birthday laura girl. love you to death.

up the canyon

made a venture with my freshman academy on friday to a campsite in the wasatch mountains of provo canyon to "watch the leaves change color." it was beautiful. unfortuante for us the leaves turned last weekend, but it was still magnificent. again, i love utah. mountains over ocean for me any day {sorry mom}.

brother wilson, my book of mormon professor, is a riot. here he is blowing the fire into huge proportions so we can better roast our hot dogs. me, savannah, christa and colin were laughing our heads off on the way up. he is just SO funny. wish you all could meet him.



oh yes... i nearly forgot i'd been tagged. you little rascal charlene

01. i'm starting to think this blog is just a place of devotion to marta. i love her to death.

02. i am quite erratic. and also romantic. i believe they coincide.

03. i am extremely proud to be from utah {especially st. george, utah} and anyone that has 'issues' with utah-people can go back where they came from.

04. i love refried beans. not exactly the most feminine food--but they sure are tasty.

05. dating {in general} gives me the willies.

06. i have a keen memory for names and occurrences.

07. "everywhere things snag me" {you must read one of my favorites: 'an american childhood' by annie dillard.} i feel a deep attachment to all forms of beauty. i suspect i am one of many. yet it still remains a consternating piece of my very insides.

cleaning check

we passed with flying colors.

{and i love my new haircut by tatum}

b + w

this is a sorry excuse for a post. i hate post posting. but oh well. here are some fun pictures from a lamo black + white party we went to last weekend. humorous part: we went to heritage halls for the party...and found several parties. came back to wyview searching for one more to our liking, only to find people returning vacuums to the office, taking out the trash and of course, reading. i love wyview. it fits me.

the cutie with the b + w headband is mary. i absolutely adore her. she is so funny and kind too. love her.



if you aren't filling your daily quota of college bloggers...visit some of my dear friends. apparently it's a trend? :)

big adventure
shooting star
city girl

in your space

found a new flickr favorite {castanet}

this reminded me forever of marta.

p.s. no hyperlinking for me. i have to come to the computer lab on campus..if anyone has tips for reconciling between mac + blogger...let me know.

wisdom from pythagoras

{photo from flickr}

"life is like a festival; just as some come to the festival to compete, some to ply their trade, but the best people come as spectators. so in life the slavish men go hunting for fame or gain, the philosophers for the truth."
- pythagoras {571 - 497 B.C.}


a little spot of ground

i sit in the same study spot everyday. there is, in a very high-traffic area of campus, a patch of grass with both shade-giving trees, and warming slots of sunlight. depending on my temperature i choose a place and open my book, read my email, or simply sleep. it is an ideal spot for observants such as myself. the spot's main characteristic is this statue of a naked indian with a tobacco pipe. i believe this indian represents quite a bit of controversy regarding the honor code, word of wisdom and the like. nevertheless, the naked indian is my solitary view.


i am making flashcards for my philosophy 210 course.
my first college quiz: 2 out of 12 {one point of which was my name}
my second college quiz: 7 out of 7 {yippee}
my first college test: next week {pray hard}


megan and tyler came to visit this past weekend. it was so fun to see them for a short time {too short!}. i love them. it is always interesting to look at your current state of life through another perspective. i got to feed them and send them on their journey home. thank you for the visit you two.


i know. i know. i haven't posted in forever. i wish it was all i could do. i have....a lot of homework. really a lot. i am enjoying myself though. the weather here has been sublime in the afternoons but i find myself growing colder with each day. nearly time to break out the sweaters and tights. i love it here, but i miss home terribly.

will try to post more {and more consistently...for now i am binge-blogging} :)



Yippee! My letter to the editor has been published today. It is totally scary but I feel so...democratic? Will post a picture later.


Wisdom from Descartes

Recent reading in Philosophy 150:

"But there is a deceiver of supereme power and cunning who is deliberately and constantly deceiving me...and let him decieve me as much as he can, he will never bring it about that I am nothing so long as I think that I am something."
-Rene Descartes

I'm Insane

I just sent in a letter to the editor of the Daily Universe. Ha! I've always wanted to and my fury and emotions have been aroused sufficiently for me to take action. If you have been following the Daily Universe, this will make more sense, but here it is. I hope it gets published.

In light of the recent editorial on Sept. 12, Tragedy’s Lesson: Learning from Camille, I wish to bring the significance of another death to the attention of the Daily Universe and all the students at BYU. In the Sept. 10 issue of the Daily Universe, the story of Camille Cleverley’s death was featured on page 1, while David Anderson’s story was on page 12. Despite the page placement of both stories, the death of David Anderson is certainly just as tragic a loss as Camille Cleverley’s, and perhaps teaches a greater lesson: realizing the value of our actions towards others. As President Samuelson said on Tuesday, “Let us never forget our duties to each other…” Regardless of studies, sobriety and outdoor safety precautions, what we learn from David as well as from Camille, is you never know the effect of your socially outgoing efforts. As a resident of Wyview Park, I deeply regret not having met David. It seems to me the Lord will be more pleased with our kindness toward each other, than a 4.0, or BYU’s ranking in the Princeton Review. President Hinckley said: “It is a season to reach out with kindness and love to those in distress and to those who are wandering in darkness and pain. It is a time to be considerate and good, decent and courteous toward one another in all of our relationships.” (“This Is the Work of the Master,” Ensign, May 1995, 71).

Erin & Garrett

I know these pictures are tiny but...just look closely.
Oh my. I seriously have never supported any couple more than I support Erin & Garrett. My cousin Erin got married an August 31. Swensen Photography has all the photographs from her wedding. Erin is such an angelic beauty to her. She seriously is one of the most beautiful people I know. And she is so hilarious, smart and so nice + nurturing. Love her. And love Garrett. He's so cool. They are seriously such a cute couple. I happy for them. I love them,