the best day of my life.

i came in 51st out of 99. bottom 50%...not bad.

not really the best day ever, but i seriously had so much fun running the Commit to Virtue 5k on saturday. it was hosted by an anti-pornography group on campus, and it was my first ever race! my friend Lynne and i registered for it and talked through our life theories (mostly gleaned from Gilmore Girls and Runaway Bride).

all i can say is, i felt better than i look like i feel in these photos. i remember when kate ran her first marathon. of course, i also remember watching my mom and dad run marathons as well, but i was too young to have experienced meaning as i did when i watched my sister kate. i know many people feel this way when watching marathoners. it is just so moving to see them run 26.2 miles! it's incredible and kate seemed to do it with such ease. i have never believed that i could run a marathon, but boy do i want to. seriously, they are all just so successful.

i felt a tiny glimpse of what it must feel like to run a marathon--success! and while the first mile or so was difficult and the steady incline up University Parkway was long, i finished. and that is something i want to feel again. i wish i could feel that way every time i run. do i have to pay $12 and wear a special t-shirt to feel happy while running? i feel rejuvenated after the Commit to Virtue 5k.

friday was my last day teaching American Heritage (for a while at least). i was sentimental but also excited. this semester i taught my favorite batch of students i've taught in the 2 years i've been TAing. i was happy to be with them and sentimental--not sad--about it ending. remember when i applied for the job, and then got it? oh man it was a dream come true. and still is. i'm guessing no job is perfect, and this one certainly wasn't the exception, but as i stood there in my very favorite lab of students, i felt that what i've been doing is something good. that there is a purpose for American Heritage and that me being a TA for it also had a purpose. and then, at that moment, I realized I was going to DC.

at the end of my Amer Her career and the moment of realization that I'm going to be interning with USAID in DC, i felt clarity that i haven't felt in a long time. i felt a sense of direction. obviously, i have no idea where i'll end up. i have a few ideas about what i want to happen--but regardless of what the specifics are, i hope i can count on doing something that contributes to society, that alleviates suffering, and gets our society closer to its ideals.

i keep saying to myself, 'yep. this is it. this is right.'

my friend buzzed this quote the other day: I realized that if I understood too clearly what I was doing, where I was going, then I probably wasn't working on anything very interesting...Work that really counts pushes us to the brink of confusion. --Peter Carruthers